Soulful Touch Wellness

Tag: meditation

  • From Desire to Discipline: My Journey Through Brahmacharya and Meaningful Connection

    In my earlier years, I was deeply engaged in a lifestyle driven by sexual pursuits, to the point where it felt like an addiction. My focus was constantly on seeking partners, dressing in a way that would attract attention, and ensuring I was always in the right social settings. Alcohol and drugs became a regular part of this cycle, enhancing the thrill of the moment but leaving me feeling drained and emotionally low the next day. Looking back, I see how this pattern created a kind of loop—one that distracted me from deeper self-awareness and held me back from realizing my full potential as a human being.

    At a certain point, I encountered the concept of Brahmacharya, the path of self-discipline and abstinence. I was intrigued by the idea that sexual energy could be redirected toward personal and spiritual growth. When I embraced this path, I felt a sense of freedom and independence that I hadn’t experienced before. My self-worth was no longer tied to external validation or fleeting encounters. Instead, I found clarity of thought, an improved ability to focus, and a sense of purpose in activities such as reading, meditation, music, and creative expression.

    However, after 13 years of abstinence, I am beginning to notice a shift in how I relate to others. While I still value the discipline and spiritual grounding that Brahmacharya has given me, I sometimes feel disconnected from ordinary human interactions. Many people around me engage in relationships and conversations that revolve around themes of love, attraction, and companionship—areas I have distanced myself from. This has led to moments of loneliness and misunderstanding, making me question how I can integrate my spiritual journey with meaningful social connections.

    I do not wish to abandon my spiritual path, as it has brought me immense growth and a deeper sense of self. However, I want to explore new ways of connecting with people—ways that are not dictated by sexual attraction or societal labels, but instead by authentic presence, mutual understanding, and shared purpose. I believe that spirituality should not isolate me but rather empower me to contribute meaningfully to the world and cultivate relationships that reflect my values.

    Through my helping work, I hope to deepen my understanding of human connection beyond conventional social norms and explore how one can engage with others from a place of inner wholeness rather than seeking external validation. This journey is not just about personal fulfillment—it is also about understanding how I can inspire and support others in their struggles, showing them that there are alternative ways to live with purpose, clarity, and emotional balance.

  • The Tricky Art of Keeping Focused

    I was feeling overwhelmed and unable to focus, so I decided to take a break and go for a weekend getaway. I packed a couple of t-shirts, my warm jacket, and all my wintry accessories, and off I went to Svalbard, Longyearbyen. It’s the northernmost human settlement in the world, and I was hoping to find silence and peace to practice yoga and meditate—to pull myself together.

    The village is otherworldly, to say the least. I got there on a cloudy afternoon on 8 February, and the place is unbelievable at this particular time of the year as the long Arctic night starts to fade into timid, short blue days. It’s not like a fully clear day; it’s just that intermezzo between day and night, lasting about five to six hours during this period of the year.

    It was with a bit of trepidation that I descent into that desert of ice with no vegetation and temperatures below zero—not too cold, though, just enough to remind you that the place is inhospitable enough to kill you in a few minutes if you get lost and a storm reaches you.

    However, the hotel was amazingly comfy, and the silence was divine! I took a bath and had a long yoga session before setting aside an hour for deep meditation. That was what I needed to tune myself back in with my inner self and regain my focus.

    One thing that struck me, though, was the fact that people didn’t seem as relaxed as I had expected. I thought that after three months in the darkness, people would be as calm as we normally get at night. You know, we’re different by night. But that didn’t seem to be the case with people in Svalbard. They were mostly kind and friendly, but I noticed something discomforting underneath—some sort of uneasiness that could well be worked out by a little yoga practice.

    The following day, I was already on my way back to London, and it turned out to be one of the most remarkable days of my life. It became day at about 9:00 AM. I had a marvellous breakfast, went for a walk, and took some pictures of that amazing blue light that would never cease to wow me. At 3:00 PM, we took off, heading to Oslo, and it was already pitch-dark. But as soon as we crossed the clouds, the light changed—it became like early morning before sunrise. The more we flew southeast, the brighter it became. After a few minutes, we glimpsed a flat orange-coloured line at the end of the horizon, which grew larger and larger until the sun emerged between the clouds and the sky. As we flew further, it became bigger and bigger, standing just above the horizon line for a couple of hours before we descended, touched the clouds, and watched it disappear, making way for the nightfall.

    It was the longest and most beautiful sunset I had ever seen, and it looked like a sunrise—rising to a certain level and lingering there before finally deciding to go down again.

    I felt blessed when we landed in Oslo, but then a few setbacks brought me back to reality. The airport was undergoing some refurbishment, so we had to take a bus to reach the terminal. Once there, I discovered that the transit area for non-Schengen citizens was makeshift. The immigration officer was a bit confused, struggled to understand English, and was adamant that I was in the wrong place. He refused to let me pass and instead sent me in search of someone to accompany me through the transfer wing. But nobody seemed to be available. After a bit of back and forth—and when some officials started to feel embarrassed by the situation—the officer finally called me back to his till, stamped my passport, and let me through so I could reach my boarding area.

    Once there, an airport employee came and asked all passengers to get up, exit the boarding room, and wait in line in the corridor for about 30 minutes before we were allowed to board the plane.

    Once onboard, I noticed that my fellow passenger wasn’t very friendly. But as I was sitting by the window at an exit, and the seat next to me was empty, I crossed my legs in a lotus pose and dove into deep meditation for the entire flight to London. That attracted a lot of attention—I could hear people taking pictures and commenting excitedly about my posture. I couldn’t help but be slightly amused when I noticed that my seatmate, who had been almost cold when we first met, was now anxious to strike up a conversation. But by that point, I was already deeply interiorised and wasn’t interested in socialising anymore.

    Today, the only thing I could think about was his reaction and change of attitude—how it must have felt to him to realise that he had judged me by my appearance, only to soon discover that I was nothing like he had anticipated.

    How silly of me to waste my time thinking about such irrelevancies! After a beautiful weekend in one of the most breathtaking places on earth, after witnessing the longest sunrise/sunset I’ve ever seen, and after the unique experience of going into deep meditation while flying, my childish mind still fixates on a minor, pointless revenge against a complete stranger who, unwillingly, had been cold to me at first.

    How is it that our minds are always trying to distract us from the things that truly matter? Why is the ego always trying to overshadow the soul?

    I wish I could stay in that blessed state of mind forever, but I can’t help thinking about minor earthly pleasures and worries.

    Any suggestions?

  • Achieving Illumination

    The Four Pillars of Spiritual Transformation

    Four Steps You Need to Take to Achieve Illumination
    Believe. Courage. Surrender. The Relinquishment of the Ego.

    Let me start with the premise that I’m not an enlightened master—not yet, although I’m working towards it. This blog is about my discoveries so far. It’s based on my real-life experiences, and I write about them in the hope that they might help someone on the path.

    Like a seed needs to decay before it sprouts, we must deconstruct ourselves before we are reborn as enlightened beings. This rebirth can be metaphorical or literal, depending on personal circumstances.

    As far as I can tell, it is a painful process. That’s why, I guess, we’re often subconsciously hesitant to commit to the spiritual path, taking untold incarnations before we choose to do so.

    Is fear justified? My response is that it is not—since God always takes care of us. However, one must believe, and this is the most difficult part. We need to refine our intuition first and then trust it, because we will always be required to risk everything, quite literally.

    The interesting thing is that we usually lose everything, hence the pain. To believe, you must make a covenant with God, offering Him your sincerity and love. Ask Him for a signal, and when it arrives, you’ll know you’re on the right path.

    We are built upon countless certainties accumulated over many incarnations. These certainties are shortcuts our subconscious uses to make quick decisions and keep us within our comfort zone. However, that comfort zone is like a maze, and we need to find a way out if we are to avoid returning indefinitely to this plane.

    There will come a moment when you feel utterly alone. Nobody will understand you or care about your predicament. When that moment comes, you’ll have to leap across the dark void, knowing there is no turning back. This takes courage.

    Faith and Courage. Now, Surrender.

    I was blessed with one of the greatest gifts anyone has ever received. My guru, Paramhansa Yogananda, came to me in flesh and blood on the night of August 15, 2010. For those who don’t know, Yogananda was a great enlightened yoga master who brought the science of Kriya Yoga to the West in the early 20th century. He died on March 7, 1952, in Los Angeles. I had prayed for a sign that Jesus had sent Yogananda to lead me to illumination, and God answered my prayer in that marvelous way.

    The event was so unique and grand that it seemed enough to ensure I’d never stray from the path to illumination. I felt so empowered that, for a moment, I believed I had already reached the heights of yoga. I was in ecstasy for several days.

    Soon after, I heard the sound of Om enveloping my whole body. A visible light surrounded me, and an incredible magnetism radiated from me. Yet, I was about to learn that this glorious blessing was only a lifeboat to keep me afloat through the storms ahead.

    During this blissful state, I dumped a damaged cellphone down a slope into a ravine. Although I immediately regretted it, it took me four days to retrieve and properly dispose of it. When I finally did, the phone—drenched, with a dead battery and no SIM card—rang. As I answered, a strong wind knocked me violently into the ravine. I fell headfirst between two massive stones, miraculously escaping unharmed.

    That was the first sign I didn’t fully grasp the magnitude of what I was experiencing.

    Soon after, I went on a pilgrimage to India, where I lost my left hip and had to get an artificial replacement. Upon returning to Italy, I developed purulent wounds on my shins. Over the next two years, I suffered memory loss, disorientation, a near-death experience, a liver tumor, and the loss of all my possessions.

    Despite these trials, I recalled my covenant with God: to do everything I could to please Him if He showed me the way. This promise, along with countless miracles, kept me on the path.

    Eventually, I realized that surrender—complete acceptance of God’s will—was the key to liberation. When I fully embraced this, joy and peace returned to my life.

    The Relinquishment of the Ego

    When we realize we are all part of the same consciousness, it becomes easier to let go of uniqueness, separateness, self-importance, and ego. We’re all manifestations of God, who created the veil of illusion, or Maya, for His enjoyment. Maya makes us believe we’re separate, but in reality, we’re one.

    Understanding this allows the ego to fade away. No matter where we are on our spiritual journey, comparing ourselves to others is futile; everyone has unique lessons to learn.

    For me, the journey has been about depending solely on God, letting go of attachments, and burning past karma. Although I am still a work in progress, I trust that hatha yoga, Reiki, meditation, a balanced diet, and a simple life free from distractions are helping me bear fruit.

  • Starting Point

    What is the purpose of spiritual growth?

    The purpose of spiritual growth is deeply personal and can vary depending on individual beliefs and perspectives. However, at its core, spiritual growth is about expanding one’s understanding of self, others, and the universe to cultivate a sense of meaning, connection, and purpose in life. Here are some key aspects:

    1. Self-Awareness and Inner Peace

    • Understanding Yourself: Discovering your values, beliefs, and purpose.
    • Finding Peace: Developing the ability to remain calm and centred amidst life’s challenges.

    2. Connection and Compassion

    • To Others: Cultivating empathy and understanding towards others.
    • To the Universe: Feeling a deeper connection to nature, a higher power, or the cosmos.

    3. Personal Transformation

    • Growth in Character: Developing virtues like patience, forgiveness, and humility.
    • Healing: Letting go of past traumas, fears, or limiting beliefs.

    4. Living with Purpose

    • Clarity: Gaining insight into what truly matters in life.
    • Alignment: Making decisions and living in harmony with your highest values.

    5. Transcendence

    • Beyond the Ego: Moving beyond self-centered concerns to a broader perspective.
    • Experiencing Unity: Feeling a sense of oneness with all life.

    6. Practical Benefits

    • Improved emotional and mental well-being.
    • Greater resilience in the face of adversity.
    • Enhanced relationships through compassion and understanding.

    How It’s Achieved

    Spiritual growth often involves practices like mindfulness, meditation, journaling, prayer, or studying spiritual texts. It may also involve engaging in meaningful relationships, spending time in nature, or pursuing acts of kindness and service.